My Name Is Stilton, Geronimo Stilton Read online

“

  Heeeelp!

  ” I screamed.

  Mousella and the rest of the staff came

  running. They all stared at me.

  Finally, my art director, Tylerat Truemouse,

  spoke up.

  “Mr. Stilton, why are you dressed up like a

  PUNK

  rocker?” he asked.

  HAPPY BIRTHDAY,

  S

  TILTON!

  It took me all day to wash the orange paint

  out of my fur. I went home that night in a

  bad mood.

  Not only was my office ruined, but it

  was

  MY BIRTHDAY!

  And

  nobody had remembered.

  Now, I don’t like to make a big deal of my

  birthday. A nice, quiet celebration is just fine.

  But I had not even received a single phone

  call. Not even from my aunt Sweetfur.

  Aunt Sweetfur always sends me a

  birthday card. Of course, she still treats

  me like I am five years old. Last year’s

  card had a picture of a tiny

  mouse holding a balloon. It said,

  46

  47

  “To my sweet little cheeselet!”

  It’s the thought that counts.

  I was in no hurry to get back to

  my empty mouse hole. So I walked

  home.

  First I passed the newsstand.

  Copies of Pinky’s new

  magazine were stacked on

  every shelf.

  Then I passed the bookstore.

  Pinky’s cheese-scented diary filled

  the window display.

  Normally, the store stacked my bestselling

  books in their window. But it seemed they

  had forgotten about me. Just like

  everyone else. I sighed.

  A few minutes later, I slumped up the stairs

  of my building. I unlocked my door and

  pushed it open.

  48

  Suddenly, the lights came on.

  “Cheesecake!” I squeaked. I JUMPED

  back. I hate surprises!

  About a hundred mice filled my house!

  They all began to sing:

  Your assistant is really great? What kind of

  birthday song was that?

  Suddenly,Iunderstood.

  The crowd parted. Pinky Pick stood in the

  center of the room. She was with Thea, my

  cousin Trap, and my nephew Benjamin.

  M

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  ”

  49

  “Aha!” I cried. Pinky was

  behind this party. And I knew

  that could not be good!

  Thea grabbed me. “Hey, Germeister,” she

  said. “This party was a great idea! And it’s

  all thanks to Pinky.”

  Thea gave Pinky a hug. Then it hit me.

  Thea and Pinky are a lot alike! They

  are both loud. And they both like to stir up

  trouble.

  I moaned. Somehow I knew

  MY LIFE

  WOULD NEVER BE CALM AND

  PEACEFUL

  again. I grabbed amozzarella

  stick from the snack table and began to munch

  on it to calm my nerves.

  Suddenly, I felt a slap on my back. I nearly

  choked on my mozzarella!

  I turned around. It was my cousin Trap, of

  course.

  “It’s about time

  YOU HAD A

  PARTY

  ,GerryBerry,” he said. “That

  assistant of yours is good for you. I love your

  new office. That old gray mouse hole of yours

  was so depressing.”

  “But I liked my gray mouse hole!” I

  protested.

  “And you were always such a penny-

  pincher

  ,” Trap went on. “I’m glad to see

  you’re living it up a bit. Caviar, truffles,

  champagne, imported cheese . . .”

  I followed Trap’s gaze across the room.

  Someone

  had set up a huge table

  piled with expensive food.

  I had abad feeling. I started to

  look around. Benjamin, my dear little nephew,

  pulled my sleeve.

  “Uncle Geronimo, isn’t Pinky pretty?” he

  52

  squeaked. “Will youpleaseintroduce me?”

  But I ignored him. I was too busy noticing

  other, bigger changes in my house.

  Someone had set up huge arrangements

  of

  EXPENSIVE FLOWERS

  .

  A shocking pink silk carpet lined my

  hallway. And each guest was carrying a little

  gift: a solid PLATINUM

  cheese holder with a diamond on the lid!

  I had that feeling again.

  This could not be good!

  53

  SNAP FLASHFUR

  I was right. Things only got WORSE.

  To start with, the sound of loud music

  suddenly filled my living room. I looked in

  the corner and saw that the famouse rock

  band Rat Attack was pounding away on their

  guitars.

  I also saw a mouse with long, dark fur

  carrying a camera. He was talking to guests

  and taking pictures. I would know that snout

  anywhere. It was

  the famouse photographer. He only took

  pictures of the biggest
celebrities.

  “What is he doing here?” I asked.

  “Isn’tit wonderful?” Thea said,

  beaming. She loves to rub elbows with

  important mice. “We hired only the best for

  S N A P F L A S H F U R

  ,

  flash!

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  !

  your birthday. Just wait until

  you see the pictures ! ”

  Snap walked up to me.

  “MY DEAR MR.

  STILTON! Look at these

  wonderful photos I took

  of you. You didn’t even

  notice I was doing it. I get

  the best pictures that way.”

  I looked at the photos. One

  showed just my paw. The

  other was my body without a

  head. My nephew Benjamin

  takes better photos than that!

  But Thea loved them.

  “Brilliant! ” she said,clapping

  her paws together. “Snap, you are

  a genius. Nobody takes photos like

  you do!”

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  “Who would want to?” I muttered.

  But Snap’s photos were the least of my

  worries. I had to ask Thea a question.

  And I was not

  sure I wanted the

  answer.

  “Who is paying

  for all of this?” I

  asked nervously.

  55

  WHAT A

  WONDERFUL IDEA!

  Thea burst out laughing. “Why, you

  are paying, of course! Pinky organized

  everything. Wasn’t that sweet of her? She

  said she would do it for free because you are

  such a good boss.”

  “Oh, dear,” I said. I suddenly felt queasy.

  “But the best is yet to come,” Thea went

  on. “In a few minutes, the greatpoet Walt

  Whitmouse will read a poem in your honor.

  He charged a lot of money to write it, but it’s

  worth every penny. After that, a thousand

  BALLOONS

  will be released into the

  sky. Then there are the fireworks. Don’t worry

  about those. We hired four of the best

  fireworks experts around to light them.

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  They’re waiting on the roof right now.”

  Balloons?

  Fireworks?

  Expensive poetry?

  The room started to swim before my eyes.

  But there was more.

  “And wait until you see your birthday

  cake,” Thea said. “Pinky and I came up

  with this idea together. We’re so much alike,

  aren’t we? Anyway, the cake has ten layers.

  Each layer is a foot high, with cream cheese

  frosting and candied cherries. On

  the very top is a winged mouse made of

  Parmesan cheese.”

  A ten-foot cake? I started to groan.

  “We had such a hard time trying

  to get someone to bake it for us,”

  Thea continued. “But Pinky and I said

  only the best for our Geronimo! So the

  Blue Ribbon Bakery agreed to stay CLOSED

  for a week so they could spend all their time

  baking your cake. It took twenty bakers

  working day and night to fi nish it!”

  I sat down on the couch.

  I could barely breathe. In my head, I started

  adding up what every thing would cost . . .

  the caviar . . . the cake . . . the fireworks . . .

  the band . . . the terrible photos. . . .

  I ended up with a very large number with

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  a lot of zeroes on the end.

  I fainted.

  I came to when Trap dumped the

  contents of an ice bucket on my head.

  “Nooooo!” I moaned. "This can't

  be happening ! ”

  Pinky ran up to me, a big smile on her

  snout. “Hey, Boss,” she said. “Did you like

  your party?”

  “I can honestly say that this is a birthday

  I will never forget,” I grumbled. I stood up,

  brushing ice cubes off my fur.

  “Did you tell him yet?” Thea asked

  Pinky.

  I got a bad feeling again. “Tell me what?”

  I asked.

  “Gerrykins, Pinky had a brilliant idea,”

  Thea said. “We are all going on a trip to

  the NORTH POLE!”

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  “The North Pole!” I squeaked. “Why on

  earth would I want to go there? It is freezing

  cold. And there are no cheese shops there.”

  “Pinky made a deal with

  MouseTV

  ,”

  Thea explained. “We are going to celebrate

  New Year’s Eve at the North Pole. The TV

  station is going to film it. Isn’t that great?”

  I was speechless.

  “Get a good night’s sleep, Boss,” Pinky said.

  “We leave first thing in the morning.”

  THE NORTH POLE?

  TOMORROW MORNING?

  I fainted again!

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  RISE AND SHINE!

  I did not sleep well that night. I kept having

  nightmares about b

  e

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  s

  i

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  e

  in the

  freezing North Pole. I felt cold

  . . . so cold . . .

  I woke up to find that Trap

  had dumped another ice

  bucket on me! My cousin

  stood there with Benjamin,

  Merry, and,of course, Pinky.

  “Rise and shine, Cousinkins,” Trap said.

  “It’s time to leave!”

  I jumped out of bed. Icecubes slid to the

  floor.

  “You did not have to wake me up like that,”

  I grumbled. “Besides, I am not going to

  THE

  NORTH POLE

  !”

  Pinky shoved a pile of clothes into my paws.

  There was a pair of boots lined with fake cat

  fur ,

  a parka, earmuffs, gloves, and other

  cold-weather gear. Everything was Pinky’s

  favorite color, of course—shocking pink!

  “I will not wear this stuff!” I protested.

  “Anyway, where is Thea? Isn’t she a part of

  this?”

  Suddenly, I heard a very loud noise outside.

  I ran up to the roof. Trap and the others

  scurried behind me.

  There, hovering in the sky, was a helicopter!

  Thea leaned out the window and waved. Her

  violet eyes were gleaming!

  “All aboard!” she cried.

  “Absolutely not!” I squeaked. “I would

  rather give up cheese than get on that

  helicopter! I am not going and I mean it! Or

  my name is not

  I

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  ”

  Thea waved at us from the helicopter.

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  SOMEDAY YOU WILL

  THANK ME

  Ten minutes later, I was sitting

  in the helicopter.

  I had no choice but to put on the shocking

  pink

  parka that Pinky had given me. Thank

  goodness

  wasn’t around to take a picture!

  I was tired, dressed in pink, and heading

  for the

  NORTH POLE

  . Definitely not a

  happy mouse. But Pinky was smiling

  brightly.

  “Just wait, Boss,” she said. “There is a

  fabumouse party waiting for us at the

  North Pole. We’ll have the best New Year’s

  Eve ever. And we’ll be on every TV set in

  Mouse Island!”

  65

  “How could you do this?” I wailed.

  “I did it for you, Boss,” Pinky said. “I know

  you love attention. There is nothing better

  than being on TV! Believe me, someday you

  will thank me for this.”

  “Cats will eat cheese before I thank you for

  this,” I mumbled.

  I was miserable. The trip took

  hours

  and hours

  . I thought it would

  never end. My stomach always gets

  queasy when I fly. Every time I looked out

  the window,

  My sister looked like she was having the

  time of her life. She piloted the helicopter

  like a real pro.

  When we finally came to the

  NORTH

  POLE

  ,my whiskers began to tremble.

  I just knew something was going to

  go wrong!

  I

  G

  O

  T

  D

  I

  Z

  Z

  Y

  .

  NORTH POLE,

  H

  ERE WE COME!

  “Get ready to land!” Thea shouted.

  Thea steered the helicopter so it pointed